I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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