I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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