the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
It's just like the Real World with babies
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
