Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
