God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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