he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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