Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
