Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize