the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
