dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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