Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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