We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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