did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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