6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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