so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
