Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ambien. No doubt about it.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
It's blow job season.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
