Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
That's intense
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Randomize
