you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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