I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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