called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
