what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
