you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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