He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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