i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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