Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
