He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
