Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Randomize
