I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
