guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
