Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
