mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
