at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
