So drunk its hurt
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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