If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
