He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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