uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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