So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
