I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Randomize
