even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
