The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
