great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
