whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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