I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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