please come you make the beer taste better
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
