So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
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