So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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