Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
