Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
