did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
