You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
