i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
